Thursday, September 18, 2008

I'm over it...

I just can't stand the corporate world. I'm very unhappy there. Love my job, love what I'm doing, but I do not belong in the corporate world. I've never worked for a large public corporation. I've always worked for smaller, privately owned companies. You wouldn't think there is that much of a difference, but let me tell you, for me anyway, there is.

I can't talk specifically about where I work, or what is going on there. And truthfully, it's not a bad situation. It's just not me.

I had this realization today. I chose to work from home. At home, I can just put my head down and do my work and not rub up against the corporate thing. I just don't care about org charts and mergers and metrics and buzz words.

So earlier this afternoon I took the dogs outside and I brought my spindle and some roving. It was a bit windy out, not too bad, and it felt nice just sitting in the sun. This spinning thing is kinda frustrating for me. I don't get the drafting thing. I don't know which hand is supposed to do what, which hand actually pulls out the fibers, and then there is my tendency to clamp down on the fiber to much and that makes it hard to draft. I think I might have found the drafting triangle. And so on this went for about 30 minutes. I'd get it for a little bit, then it would all go to hell again. The thing I really like about spinning on the spindle though, is that I think about things I wouldn't normally think about. I thought about how nice it would be to be sitting out in the sun in the country somewhere near a field and a lake with no sounds of civilization. No sound of cars, no planes. Just me and the sun and nature sounds. And I thought, well that's something I can easily make happen. Then I got to thinking about the spinning itself and I thought that 200 years ago that a woman much like me took a break from her chores and sat out in the sun in her dooryard spinning on a spindle. And that brought me back to the absolute one thing I would give anything to be able to do. And that is, boys and girls, have a farm. Seriously. If I had the money and the skills, I'd do it. If I had the money to BUY the skills, I'd do it. And I've been thinking about it the rest of the day. How it makes me feel when I think about that as a lifestyle, and how right it feels to me. And who's to say it can't happen? I believe in the law of attraction and that anything is possible. The only thing really standing in my way are my own self-imposed limitations and fears. In my heart I know that this would be right work for me. So universe - show me the way, I'm paying attention.

See, you never really know where .5 oz. of roving and a spindle may take you. I liked today's journey, and it is a good reminder for me to create more of these little moments in my days.

4 comments:

Sonya said...

I love your dream.

SleepyEyes said...

What a nice post, Lisha! I can just see you thinking, spinning, trying to draft and making your plans. I think it's wonderful that you know what you want and are ready to get it. Asking the Universe to show you the way is so perfect. You KNOW I'm cheering for you!

Long Ridge Farm said...

Yes, you have to "listen" for the signs. They aren't always as clear as we like to have them but dreams can become reality, how else would any of us get through another day?
Any time you want a dose of farming, come on over!

Jennie said...

I love it. I would totally visit you. (And go home--farming is not my dream!)

I love the thoughts that come up as you spin. Isn't it fun? I was just switching hands like you did, last night. Can't figure out which hand pinches and which drafts. What I do know is that I'm very much still learning about spindle spinning.